Posted on 03 February 2012. Tags: healthy kids
I think having a healthy marriage where two people actually like each other is important. Good for the Totally Desperate Mom. Good for the kids. Just all around good. * And yet, it can be pretty hard to make the marriage a priority when you have little ones running around finger painting with their own poop.
Excerpt from Totally Desperate Mom:
When you said “I do” to your husband there was no motherhood escape clause. You didn’t say, “I do until we have kids,” or, “I do until things get tough.” I don’t know what your specific vows were, but I suspect they included a lifetime commitment to love and support your husband. Many moms neglect that commitment and instead direct all of their energy, love, and support to their children. This is not healthy for the marriage or the children. And yet, it is pretty easy to do. As busy, sometimes exhausted moms, what can we do to continually make our marriage a priority? I talked with some of my fellow TDMs about this and we came up with the following tips. (Just offering one tip here on Fit Moms Fit Kids Club Today. Get the rest
here.)
* Create common interests. I have read quite a few books on marriage and the drastic differences between men and women. One book I read was about how to affair-proof your marriage. While I enjoyed most of the book, there was one chapter that really turned me off –the chapter about recreational companionship. The chapter basically said that a husband and wife should participate in only those activities that both parties can enjoy together. Would my husband ever join me in scrapbooking, or would he ever give my hip-hop class a shot? Not a chance. Do I ever want to learn to play chess or peruse the Internet for the latest technology advances? No thank you.
In spite of the fact that I didn’t agree with everything in this chapter, I applied its principles and joined my husband in watching a Formula One race. Does it get any more boring than watching cars go round and round a track? Yes, watching golf. But my husband doesn’t watch that. But because my husband spent so much time on the weekends watching those F1 races on television, I decided to suffer through watching an entire race with him. Guess what happened? I enjoyed it. He explained the nuances (yes, there are race car nuances) of the sport (yes, I now call Formula One racing a sport) to me, which made the race much more interesting.
Formula One racing has now become a major source of bonding for the entire family. Shiloh makes scones on race weekends, and we sit and watch the race together. Well, the kids get pumped for the scones and go in and out of watching the race. And I have been known to fold some laundry (it’s a long race), but we all enjoy the F1 race days.
To top things off, Shiloh and I even joined a “fantasy Formula One league” on the Internet where we pick our “A” drivers, “B” drivers, and teams every race week. After reading that, I know some of you may now be tempted to shred this book, but before you do you must know two things. First, I won the Fantasy League this year. The prize was nothing. My team name was “Moms for Massa.” (Massa was one of the drivers for Ferrari®.) And second, joining my husband in this activity has been awesome for our marriage.
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So there you have it Fit Moms. Are you willing to check out something that your husband is interested in even if you think it is really lame? Remember, this is not a lifelong commitment (the marriage is, just not his boring activity), but give it a chance and see what happens. And then let me know!
*If you are a single mom – feel my hug come through the screen and come back for my non-marriage post next month. Or take note for that future marriage . . .
Wendy Hagen, Author "Totally Desperate Mom: Keeping It Real In The Motherhood"
Posted in News, Totally Desperate Moms
Posted on 02 December 2011. Tags: banana bread recipe, healthy banan bread recipe, healthy kids recipes, recipe, recipe for banana bread, recipes banan bread, sugar free banana bread
I survived my 2 months of sugar-free living. Maybe next month I will blog more about that. But in the meantime, I have a Sugar-Free Banana Bread recipe for you that I found and made several times during my sugarless life. I adapted it from this recipe at Food.com. It has the same consistency and texture as banana bread, but not as sweet. If I were not doing the sugar-free thing I don’t know how much I would have liked it, but for a sugar free item, it is pretty good. And my son loved it.If you are trying to cut out or reduce refined sugar in your life, give this a whirl.
Sugar-Free Banana Bread
2 cups whole wheat flour or white flour
2 tsp baking powder
1/2 tsp baking soda
1/2 tsp cinnamon
4 medium, ripe bananas
1/2 cup apple sauce
1 egg
1/3 cup vegetable oil
1/2 cup unsweetened orange juice
You can add some other junk like nuts, cranberries or raisins, but I am not into those so I don’t. If you are not on a specific sugar-free thing you can add chocolate chips because those make everything taste better.
1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees
2. Combine flour, oats, baking soda, baking powder, cinnamon in a bowl.
3. Blend the bananas in some sort of kitchen gadget that can puree them.
(I used my blender. Don’t be deceived by the fact that it looks like a nice, fancy, blender. It does not work well and I don’t recommend it at all.)
4. Combine pureed bananas, apple sauce, egg, vegetable oil and OJ in another bowl.
5. Add the junk from bowl #1 to the junk in bowl #2 and mix.
4. Pour all the junk into a greased loaf pan.
5. Bake for 40-50 minutes.
6. Cool on wire rack.
I added butter even though I’m a Fit Mom. And I feel totally okay with it.
Wendy Hagen, Author "Totally Desperate Mom: Keeping It Real In The Motherhood"
Posted in Totally Desperate Moms
Posted on 04 November 2011. Tags: low sugar diet, low sugar recipe, no sugar diet, totally desperate moms, wendy hagen
As I write this it has been exactly one month since my husband and I got on the crazy train. You know the one that doesn’t have sugar on it until Thanksgiving? With the exception of one treat every 2 weeks?
I wanted to update you on our insanity progress. The desire or craving for sugar is still there. However, it does not have the hold on me that it did before we started this adventure. And that’s cool because that was kind of the point. I had gotten too far off moderation and needed a little cleanse. Because sugar is just not good for you. And it’s not just about adding to my cellulite collection. It’s about overall health – there is so much disease, autoimmune, cancers, and other dumb things out there. I know there are genetic and environmental factors at play, but I also think what we put into our bodies is a major contributing factor.
My first treat day (two weeks in) I decided to allow myself two treats instead of one because well . . . I wanted to even though my husband was not supportive of my endeavor. I had an 8 ounce hot chocolate and one chubby hubby bar. It was glorious and I felt great afterwards. For real. Two weeks later my treat was hot chocolate. Because I love it. We originally said that we would not have any natural sugars like honey or maple sugar, but we decided to chuck that out the window. So a few times we had sugar-free breakfast foods with maple syrup and I think my husband had some honey in his oatmeal.
The results?
1. My stomach is a lot flatter. Less bloated. Definitely lost some of my spare tire.
2. I have lost 2 or 3 pounds. (I didn’t weigh myself until a week into and I just don’t track my weight that much. I go more with how I feel and fit into my clothes.)
3. My sugar craving has subsided, but it is not gone.
4. I can’t wait for Thanksgiving time, but I plan on going back to moderation (2-3 treats a week) and I think this mini-cleanse has helped.
For those of you decided to join me in this endeavor in some way . . . how are you doing?
Wendy Hagen, Author "Totally Desperate Mom: Keeping It Real In The Motherhood"
For more of Wendy check out her awesome blog here. She has a great book, and you can check out her speaking schedule there too!
Posted in News, Totally Desperate Moms
Posted on 08 October 2011. Tags: low sugar diet, no sugar diet, totally desperate mom, wendy hagen
Confession: I have a major sweet tooth. I love home-baked goodies. I love hot chocolate. I wish I could be as strong at
Fit Mom Lori who has no refined sugar in her house. But what about cake pops? And dark chocolate? And cream cheese chocolate chip cookies?
There’s nothing like a homemade treat made with real butter and real (processed and refined) sugar. But refined sugar has no nutritional value whatsoever. In fact, it is really
bad for you.
That being said, I am personally okay with most things moderation. Even treats. But what does that mean? Once a week? Once a day? Once every five minutes?
Lately I have been getting away from moderation and into obsession. At least one treat almost every day. Or maybe two. Or like the other night when I had four chocolate chip cookies. (They were so good.) And because I am consuming more sugar, I crave it more. I am still working out hard so it is not really affecting my body visibly, but I know it is not good for me.
But I decided (and dragged my husband along with me because it is easier when someone else is doing it with you) that I was going to cut out sugar for a while. My husband is a bit more extreme than me so he said “No sugar until Thanksgiving.”
That is crazy.
I responded “One treat a week until Thanksgiving.” (I don’t like doing things too extreme because I feel it sets you up for failure and then you bail on the whole thing – thus the treat allowance.)
His comeback “One treat every two weeks until Thanksgiving.”
Fine. No sugar – not even maple syrup or honey, which are natural sugars. (I know sugar is in just about everything like milk, bread, etc. We are not cutting out all that. Just treaty things.)
It’s on. Started on Wednesday, September 28th.
How are you doing on your sugar intake? Do you want to marry it like I do? Do you want to join Shiloh and I on this little treat fast? Once you go public it is hard to turn back . . .
Wendy Hagen, Author "Totally Desperate Mom: Keeping It Real In The Motherhood"
For more of Wendy check out her awesome blog here. She has a great book, and you can check out her speaking schedule there too!
Posted in News, Totally Desperate Moms
